Hey Joe, where you goin' with that thought in your head?

I recently reached out to a young college student, a young man, who seems to be full of anger and angst.  I stumbled upon a video he posted (one of many) which basically featured him wandering about a campus parking lot ranting/thinking out loud.  Some of his thoughts were - very grim, and he identified himself as- or at least mentioned - MGTOW.  His thoughts and speech were disorganized and it reminded a great deal of some of the men and women in crisis that I worked with as a mental health professional.

Honestly, if ever there was a candidate for someone going off the deep end and going on a killing spree - this kid ( I'm calling him "Joe")  fits the bill.  Of course it's impossible to predict such a thing with any degree of certainty.   I've been in the presence of men and women who were in the midst of full blown psychotic episodes - men and women with murder in their eyes and on their tongues - who genuinely scared the shit out of me, but who had still managed to maintain enough control to refrain from acting out with physical violence.  I hope I have "Joe" pegged all wrong.

Our young man, "Joe", is certainly suffering from some kind of "above average" angst, or perhaps a personality disorder, or perhaps both and more.  I'm not saying that because he threatened to kill me for "tattling" on him by posting a link to an online crisis hotline and asking a fellow MGTOW, a particular individual who I think has a very healthy and positive take on men going their own way, to reach out to "Joe" - which he did, promptly and with great charity, wisdom and sensitivity - far beyond my capabilities, which is why I asked him for his help  (thank you again for your sage advice - I hope "Joe" absorbed some of it).

So this experience brought to mind something that has been a concern of mine for quite some time - actually it's more of a worry, and I think it's a justified worry.  MGTOW is NOT for everyone.  It has been said before, but I'd like to take a stab at it for myself, and perhaps with a more direct and honest approach to this often said, but rarely explained saying.

The fact of the matter is this:  MGTOW has a very great potential to appeal to unhealthy minds.  There I've said it and it needs to be said - in fact it's irresponsible to not to face this fact.  Now, of course, this is all the evidence and spin required to completely demonize MGTOW in a society that drifts further and further from the capacity for critical thought with every reactionary law, pop song, or celebrity tweet.  At the risk of sounding like a beatles album burning fuddy duddy of yore - we have a generation coming up, very soon, that includes a population of people who (and how do I put this lightly) have about as much regard for their fellow human as Ted Bundy.  I would call it thug culture, but really it more closely resembles a frighteningly prophetic, but more psychopathic, version of  the film "Idiocracy" (think Idiocracy with more than a healthy pinch of "A Clockwork Orange".

Some of these unhealthy minds are already taking up the banner of MGTOW, as my friend "Joe" has - dabbling, co-opting those aspects that fit into his very grim world view - disregarding the rest.  That's human nature.  There are a lot of justifiably angry men, who feel alienated in this society - for any of a number of reasons - some of which have absolutely nothing to do with feminism's systematic misandry.  They are disillusioned with their government, their political affiliation, their future, their very identity.  There is an epidemic of lost men and boys in this world.  Some of them call themselves MGTOW, but they are stuck in the anger/disappointment and/or disillusionment stage. Who could blame them when there's so much to be justifiably angry, disappointed and disillusioned about?

Chronic anger and alienation is poison.  It can't be sustained without harming you, and eventually, and inevitably, it will KILL you.  Anger has it's place, so does alienation - they are powerful motivators, but the "doing" part of the motivation will either lead one to do positive things, to make positive changes - or it will lead to negative ones.  The alienation part is simply an inevitable part of regaining consciousness and is required to gain perspective and quiet the mind.  Men also need "A Room of One's Own", and it's high time men build one, complete with a "do not disturb" sign, lock and sound proofing.  Men must avail themselves of it, when they need the space, peace and quiet to actually reflect and make sense of the world and conditions they find themselves in.  A space without talking heads, without competitive agendas - both of which seek to ensare his mind and hijack his perception.  This is not a retreat, a cave to shut oneself away and wait for "this to all blow over";  It is an oracle to commune with one's own mind and purpose, and it IS TO BE GUARDED JEALOUSLY, AND REGARDED SACRED.  It is a place of badly needed replenishment and healing.

 A MGTOW must choose the positive, to heal and replenish, and to evolve or his original impulse to go his own way, is in vain and pointless. He must make the space to do it.  MGTOW creates that space.

Our friend "Joe" is on a path to institutionalism right now.  He sees no hope, refuses to hear "hope" because it doesn't sound like what he imagined, therefore he feels no hope.  MGTOW means solipsism,  "cool" and spiteful alienation to him.  He's not going his own way, he's going the way of millions of incarcerated/institutionalized men in this society.  He's frustrated because his life doesn't measure up to the lies he's been spoon fed since birth - he's at that stage, and he may never transcend to see the possibility of a good life, a happy life, as defined and realized by him, not someone else.  A life fulfilled by self realization and development above and beyond the measuring stick shoved into his face (into all of our faces).   He's been quantifying himself with this stick, since birth.  He's come up short, again and again - obsessed, yet semi-conscious of the futility of it.  Not yet fully conscious of moving on and devising a more accurate and useful system of measurement - his own and not limited by its precurser, or its contemporaries.

I predict in the not-so distant future, that someone like "Joe" will exact his revenge on society with murder, and under the banner of MGTOW. All that is required is one sentence, one comment, one video "liked" and MGTOW becomes a dangerous cult. You know what the propaganda machine will do with that (we've already seen the insinuation with the "gym MRA killer".

MGTOW, on that day, will become a "dangerous" fringe group.  We'll be the new domestic terrorist of the month, but here's the kicker.  It won't matter.  The name will will be hissed with even greater venom and it will fall into disfavor and disuse among us, but men will still be going their own way and therein lies the true power of this idea.  MGTOW is not death, it's not revenge, it's not about alienation or extinction..  It's life and evolution.  And like evolution, MGTOW is inevitable.